Back to work

Mama went back to work today. She left me with Emmy. I was very happy!  She was a little sad but told me of all the fun I would have!  She was right!  So much fun!  Uncle Robbie even wore me in the baby carrier so I could sleep!  Nothing wrong with that!

So much love!  I cannot wait to grow up and be able to play with my cousins like JB. They love me!

Peace out!

~CB

Nursing

I'm sorry we didn't have many nights of this. But I promise I enjoyed every one of them!

Love 

~Mama

Last of mamas freshly pumped milk

At 8:59pm on 4/27/16, I drank the last drop of the last freshly pumped milk mama pumped before she went into her chemo treatment.  Daddy started the bottle but I left the last ounce for mama to share with me.  She laid me against her breast and I drank until there was nothing left and slowly popped off it like I would do to her, making sure I tried to stretch it back some. The bottle nipple doesn't stretch like mama does. She then put in this pacifier which I sucked on for a second before spitting it out. My eues stayed closed as I rooted around on mama shoulder trying to get comfy. I do so love that she lets me sleep on top of her. She said soon I'll get big and have to sleep beside her but for now she snuggles me tight on her chest!  I've got a good mama!  She loves me so and I love her! 

Mama said she loved hearing me coo back and forth with daddy. She said that is what she and JB did and she's glad daddy is getting the chance to do it with me,  even thigh it makes her sad too.  She wants that time with me. She said she's a tad bit jealous and in awe all at once. Silly mama! 

I did take this amazing formula mama bought me from the uk last night and some today. It tastes almost like mamas milk.  I drink it like a champ. Mama said she's very proud of me! 

Well that's my  update! 

Love

CB

Last night of nursing

CB

Tonight was our last night of nursing. Our journey has been very short but you have done very well! You latched on immediately after birth and nursed so much you quickly gained back your birth weight plus more by our 2 week Drs visit!  You get very angry at the boob when it lets down fast or when you are tired.  I think you will adjust quickly to a bottle since you do not really nurse to sleep but rather nurse cry then go to sleep. I'm so sorry our journey is cut short. I'm thankful for the time we have had!  

Love 

Mama 

I'm sorry CB

Oh CB, I did not picture your first year of life to be with a mom who is fighting cancer and fighting to stay alive for you and your brother! 

I'm so sorry you will not have the same mom your brother did. The energetic mom up for any adventure and trip! The mom who took him for daily walks, to the zoo, beach, festivals, visiting friends and more.

I'm sorry there will be times I can't pick you up 

I'm sorry we will have to emergency wean you from nursing and you will have to take a bottle 

I'm sorry i have to feed your formula 

I'm sorry you'll have nights away from me before you turn one

I'm sorry you won't have my hair to pull and eventually not have boobs to comfort you.

Oh I love you so much and am so sorry I'm sick. I wish so much this wasn't happening to us, to me.  

But what you wil get is more time with daddy and Emmy. You will always have my smiles and Kisses. You and your brother are my greatest accomplishments!  I wil fight to watch you grow up! I will fight to watch your personality develop! And I really hope you don't remember mama being sick and only remember my love!

All my love

~mama

2 month check up

I had my two month check up on Thursday

My measurements were:

15 head

23.5 length 

14.5 weight

Dr. Cody said I was perfect he also did not like hearing that Mama has breast cancer but said it's OK if I lose a little weight moving over to a bottle and formula

Mama will take pics on Tuesday of me. 

I don't like mama having cancer. She cries sometimes and tells me how much she loves me and that she's not leaving me. I believe her!  I'm sad I'm not going to have her boobie much longer but i would rather have her around!

I love mama

Love 

~CB